The Interviewon December 3, 2012 at 12:01 am
Posted In: Comic
I’ve only ever had one job interview in my life and it was the weirdest damn experience because it was the family business. I’ve got a job interview today for a job I’d very much like to have.
Commentors! What is the weirdest question you’ve ever been asked in a Job Interview and How did you respond?
I’m continuing the Holiday sale for a bit of December. I recommend ordering sooner rather than later to increase your chances of it arriving before the big day.
So, the moral of the story is don’t be too honest?
reminds me of the cop scene in liar liar http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xmal7i_liar-liar-police-scene_fun. Also isn’t Jim Carrey Canadian? must be a Canadian thing
“be gentle” xD
The weirdest interview question I’ve ever had is: What animal would you use to describe yourself and why? Taco bell has some hard hitting questions. But apparently they don’t hire cats.
Lol I had this one with a state agency interview. I don’t remember what position/agency it was for, but it was so unexpected and off the wall. I also had “What is your favorite color”
“Tomatos?” I answered “Yes.”
“A bull is stuck in a ditch. How do you get it out?” I answered, “Crane and Ladybull pheromones.” I got the job, and then they made me a manager.
Actually, the best advice for interviews I ever got was, when asked about your weaknesses, do everything possible to make it sound like a strength. e.g. Having problems with anxiety means that in your regular life, you’ve learned when to say “no” as a necessity to combatting anxiety.
But then again, what the fuck do I know?
And that’s the best way to answer these. Oddball and plausible. Imagination test basically.
One of those “Thinking outside the box” questions certain management fads thought were highly important.
I did not have any odd questions but I thought of Mitch Hedberg when I was asked where do you see yourself in 5 years. I have 3.5 years to wait to make the best inneroffice joke ever.
Unless this is too late and the interview happened already, go get ’em, champ.
Haha. I see what you did with that nameplate there. Subtle.
Bullets. Final answer, Regis.
Seriously, do they ask those questions to test their own bullshit meters?
“Where do you see yourself in five years?” Playing WoW in my underwear, eating cheetos. >.>
This was about two years, I was rather down on my luck after being ostracized by my old co-worker, purely due to my appearance and when I had been hired. Ridiculous I know. As I said, I was down on my luck and trying as many options as I could, one such option was an exterminator; it sounds odd, but they often have incredible dental coverage (which matters here in the states.) The question I found weird (though thinking back on it I suppose it was understandable it just struck me as odd) was whether I had any experience in exterminating and if so how proficient had I been.
I responded, to both questions, with a simple but affirmative “Of Course! OF COUURRSSSE!!” I then displayed my prowess by exterminating everyone in the building, even the custodian.
Suffice it to say, I didn’t get the job. :\
Humans are tough towards Daleks these days. It’s as if someone would continously give you a bad name.
Oh and mind out those blue boxes.
why do you want to work here? i hate Walmart was my answer. (mind you i work at target now and i lied about the Walmart thing and usually walk around Walmart in my target uniform buying things i need there)
Best interview ever:
“Hit me with your cruelest insult.”, “Why the fuck would I do that, you cockjuggling thundercunt? What kind of insidious bastard would I have to be to think that calling you a worthless piece of maggotflesh would help assure me a job at this fucked up, terribly abusive capitalistic, soul-crushing excuse for employment? Then again, you work at this rat-infested fuckhole serving subpar food to subpar people doing a job less complicated than things monkeys have been trained to do and certainly less advanced than what we’re capable of through automation, and probably without ever realizing that all you’re doing is inflating someone else’s wallet perpetuating a standard of abusing yourself for someone else’s means until you get too old to do such, in which case you’re going to spend the last few years of your life desperately struggling to make something of yourself or enjoy yourself despite your failing health before you die, so what could I really say that’s more disheartening than the sad reality that you’re already facing?”
Three references and a lot of honesty… I got the job on the spot, because if I was willing to go into the job knowing exactly what I was in for, there’s no way a customer could crush my spirits, and I had no illusions about just how terrible the job is.
The point, since some might be curious, is whether or not I could verbally spar with someone or if I’d break down into tears… said manager would prefer the customer to be devastated than an employee: one’s harder to replace than the other, according to corporate..
Was the job in the town of Molly-Be- Damned?
Being an employer myself I usually ask the questions and being in the industry I am in some of them are pretty odd:
1) Are you okay with getting REALLY close to another man’s junk? (for cameramen)
2) What products do you use to get seemen off clothes? (for makeupartists)
To me these are perfectly valid questions but eventhough these people know what industry they are getting into the questions never fail to make them look queezy….
One of my classmates interviewed with a job where they subjected applicants to a polygraph as part of the hiring process. They asked her “So – how long have you been having sex with animals?”
We interviewed a guy and one of our questions is, “if you could have a super power, what would it be?” The guy questioned said that he would want to be able to turn invisible so he could go into places like a girls locker room. He was not joking.
“Wow, not only did I get the job, but I also got a raise!”
I really like that you don’t break the 180°-rule.
I hate when interviewers ask me to describe myself in three words. I once responded “angry, young, and poor.” Nailed it.
Weirdest question at an interview: “So, you play WoW huh? Are you going to be playing that sneakily at your desk here while you’re supposed to be working? Like Patience? Or.. minesweeper?” and about five minutes later “What is this Paladin you keep talking about? Can you take that to work?”
Good luck with the interview!
Me and that cat have a lot in common!
Good luck with the job interview!
Yeah, there is a such thing as too much honesty…
I was fresh out of high school and applying for a local factory that was actually in the process of closing down in the next 6 to 12 months to move the whole thing to Mexico. They simply needed the bodies to finish up what they were doing so they could get the hell out of dodge.
I guess they just didn’t care anymore, because the guy interviewing me asked me how badly I wanted the job and if I’d be willing to roll a peanut across the floor with my nose to have it.
I told him I was going to shove that peanut up his ass and was promptly escorted out of the place by security.
mine was have you ever killed any one
Books-a-Million doesn’t fool around.
Yep, all about spin. Within reason.
Not during an interview, but right after I was finished being trained for safety to work on UPS’s sort line I was asked several safety questions by the safety inspector. When I couldn’t recall most of the answers (I was lifting heavy boxes at the time) he said to me “You just finished safety training and you don’t remember these answers?”. I replied “If I had a good memory, do you think I’d waste my time working here?”. 😛
Applying as a receptionist at an office. They asked me if I had any medical experience. I told them I had an expired CPR card. That was apparently not good enough…
TMI. “I’m trained to perform CPR” is the better way to say that 😛
I was more concerned with the amount of medical experience they required from someone who would supposedly be answering phones at an office where the worst injury SHOULD be a paper cut.
I once knew a guy named Richard Head…. yeah.
Obviously had a relative here in our county with the same “Lets see if we can blight his school education years”. Actually two. Dick Head and Copper Penny. Got sniggers every time roll call came around.
Weirdest question I’ve been asked: What make you think you can do this job better than the other 3 people I’ve interviewed today? (for a warehouse job in which I was the 4th of 4 people being interviewed for the job)
My answer: Because you obviously have an eye for talent and saved the best canidate for last. (I didn’t get the job, btw)
Never really knew how to answer the question of what my greatest weakness was, until recently (wasn’t even at an interview, it just popped in my head, for some reason) – I am a completionist.
I can’t stand leaving something half-finished or done in a half-assed way. It gnaws at me, it haunts my dreams, and that’s assuming it lets me SLEEP in the first place. I just can’t rest until it’s done … and done RIGHT.
It’s almost like a limited, focused version of OCD, heh.
the end of that cats tail looks like a calico penis.
Fears include “The Vagina” Poor ARG D: